Definitely witnessed one of my favourite e-mails today. It read:

Hello Folks,

Had to move a carrier bag on the bottom shelf of the fridge to make room for the milk. Unfortunately the contents ( 3 pieces of fruit ) had been there some time as indicated by their green furry jackets that were wearing to keep them selves warm in the cool climate they were living in. Having taken them by surprise so early in the morning they partially emptied their bodily fluids all over the bottom of the fridge which I kindly cleaned up for them after finding them an alternative home in the bucket.

To prevent further cruelty to food stuffs could any body using the fridge make an effort to remove anything they leave on Fridays.




p.s. who owns the green thermos flask in the fridge. It’s been there for some time and I don’t have any biohazard stickers.